June 20, 2006

Game time!

Posted in Games at 9:58 pm by Calico Jack

Sometimes there is nothing better than sitting at the computer for several hours because you're addicted to one of the many Flash-based games that seem to pop up everywhere on the internet. We here at Ignorant Critics would like to offer some suggestions for our favorites. All of these games are guaranteed to waste much of your time, but we doubt you'll even notice the minutes and hours fly by.

First up is the Alphabet Game. The premise of this is quite simple: how fast can you type the alphabet? Trust me, it isn't quite as easy as it sounds. The fastest scores are just over a second, but I've never been able to get much below 3.5 seconds. I never imagined I could spend ten or fifteen minutes simply typing the alphabet over and over again, but it is quite fun.

Next we have De-Animator, a side-scrolling shooter where your goal is to kill all of the zombies before they reach you. I have no idea how many levels there are, as I've never made it past Level 13 or 14. The animation is extremely fluid, and frantically firing dozens of rounds at a horde of approaching zombies provides quite the thrill. Hint: if you shoot the zombies before they fully stand up, they only require one shot to kill. And never use the shotgun, especially in later levels. The reload rate is far too slow.

Escapa! is the most spartan of the games listed here, but it is still addictive. You control a little red sqaure inside a box. You must avoid touching both the walls of the box and getting hit by four blue rectangles that bounce around the walls. Normally I wouldn't recommend such a bare-bones game, but Escapa is interesting because the rectangles move in the same pattern every single time. If you can memorize the pattern, you'll be able to last for a long time, relatively speaking. Good luck making it past 25 seconds, though.

Hapland is one of the most brilliant puzzles I have seen in a very long time, but it's rather hard to explain. You must light both of the torches and open the portal, but there are no rules. Sometimes you have to click on things more than once. Sometimes it is all about timing. Sometimes helpful icons are engraved on the walls. Just try not to kill too many of your people; you need them to achieve your objective. Confused? Give it a try; it will become much more clear. However, there can be a high level of frustration involved; if you get stuck there are hints available online. Hapland 2 and 3 are also out; I've beaten the second and I anticipate spending quite a few hours working on the third.

If you don't like shooters or puzzlers, you might enjoy Roboclaw. You control a robotic arm using only the four arrow keys. Pick up the blue ball, and drop it in the hole without hitting any obstacles. Every level is timed, so you'll have to be quick.

Squares is much like Escapa!, except on steroids. 'Nuff said.

Finally, I would like to present Stick Arena. This is a multiplayer game, but don't even attempt it if you don't have a good broadband connection. You're a stick figure armed with a variety of weapons, from a baseball bat to a sword to an AK-47. Your goal? Kill all of the other players in the arena as often as you can before time runs out. Much hilarity will ensue.



1 Comment »

  1. Shay said,

    I stink at the Alphabet one which surprises me because I thought I was a fairly good typer. Hmm I suppose I don’t use the letter z fery often though. Lol, I wonder how Nathan would do…

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